The Diary of Queen Mothy |
War and other new, awkward situations written @ 11:27 AM on March 20, 2003 Last night, as I was struggling with a speech I had to memorize for class, dawn was creeping over Bagdad, and so were the U.S. troops. Even then, I wasn't sure what to think about this war. I'm still of the disposition that we needed to do something about that Iraqi tyrant, but I'm just not so-- with foreign relations as they are-- that this was the right time to do it. I think, well, perhaps sooner is better than later, but I just don't know. I'm kind of ticked off at how American diplomacy, or lack thereof, has been handled the past six months, and how a great number of the American constituency has been ignored. I'm tempted to call Bush a dictator and that the U.S. is beginning to develop some very un-democratic leanings. But in the end, all I can do is sigh and say, "So this is how Rome fell." It's too bad, really. But now that the war is officially underway and there's nothing more the protests can really do except keep protesting-- which God knows doesn't help with this administration-- I guess the most we can wish for is that it's over as quick, painless, and as bloodless as possible. Said my mom, "Just think, Sam. This time next year Americans will be vacationing in Iraq like they do in Vietnam, and think of all the Persian rugs that will be on e-bay!" You can laugh all you want, but I think she was half-serious. She always wanted a Persian rug. In any case, I at least support the troops. I hope everything goes well with them. *** Rehearsals for the show are going well. I feel like I really don't know what I'm doing, though. It's more like the director telling me to jump and me asking, "How high?" It's actually beginning to distress me. Oh well. I guess all I have to do is get through this week, and I'll be pretty much set for the next few weeks, until tech rehearsals begin. Then it's a whole new ballgame. I mutter to myself every now and then, "I wish you had said no, Sam, to this stagemanaging thing." But-- it's got my foot in the door for other positions. One thing is for sure: this will either make me or break me. The other stagemanagers for the rest of the shows have been supportive enough, but because they have been doing it so long, they often forget to tell me large little details such as the fact that it's my responsibility to stake out the stage. I didn't know that; I thought the scenic designer or the TD were going to take care of that. They have also failed to give me a set of keys for the theater, so now Michael, the other stagemanager, has to either switch-off with me with his set or un-lock and lock the theater before and after our rehearsals every night. And I hate depending on other people. Really. I am just so afraid of screwing up, you know? The only thing I will allow myself to admit that as a freshmen who has not really held stagemanging positions in the past, I'm doing a hell of a job. But still... I feel like I'm missing the main points. Mais que sera sera! *** So yeah, as I briefly mentioned earlier, I botched up my speech. And in the last place in the world where I thought I would screw up! It wasn't too bad, just an awkwardly long pause as I tried to regain my stance in the speech, but it was as if I could hear the grade dropping like a smart bomb over Iraq... ooooh, that sounded cheesy, but hey, I couldn't help it. So here I am. My history class was cancelled today, all due to the fact that my professor is still trying to recover from a heart attack he had over spring break. The good news is that most of my English papers are written, my sound test is done (even though the class more than likely bombed it), that horrendous persuasive speech is over, and all that;s left to complete is this fucked up wire sculpture I'm doing in my 3-D Design class. I am about to go to the theater office to discern why I have registration holds and get those lifted so I can register for my fall classes this Friday. Tonight is the opening reception for the student art show. I guess I'm going. And I guess I should dress up a little. I really don't know; I've never been to one of these things before. And I hate the drawing that the judge picked, but I guess he could have chosen worse. Okay, okay, in all truth, the picture is not that bad, but I would have preferred that he picked one of my two paintings at the very least. I really feel like I've been thrown into all these new, awkward situations in which I don't know how to handle or conduct myself. I don't know the limit of my powers at this stage. It's like I'm anxious to get ahead, but I don't want to step on anyone's toes in the process. *** I'm going home this weekend. I actually wasn't planning on it initially, but a) my car needs and oil change, and b) I have been summoned by certain members of the posse, who are still on their spring break. I guess they'll be trying new hypnosis methods on me. Not sure if it'll work. If there's one thing I did inherit from my dad beyond ugly feet, it's my inability for another to hypnotize me and "subconsciously control" me. Oh well. Should be interesting.
A Bit of History ~ And Onward! L'Amour Toujours! - August 08, 2005 |
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