The Diary of Queen Mothy |
A little bit of Life. written @ 6:24 PM on April 02, 2003 I've been thinking about a lot of things lately. But I get into that later. Last night, I told TJ thanks, but it was probably best that I didn't go to that wedding with him. I mean, if I had known him better and if I had been sure we were going to go just as friends, I would have set aside time. But I figure I'm going to be using that weekend to finish my incredibly God-awful art concepts project... the one that determines whether you pass or fail the class. That class is so incredibly boring/pointless. At least from where I'm sitting. However, it's evident enough that there are some true fools in that art department who appear as if they woke up one day and said, "Gee! I wanna choose an easy career! How 'bout if I become an artist?!" Idiots. Hopefully by the time the rest of the freshmen get through their foundations courses, the professors will have separated the men from the boys. I mean, I hate to be the mean-spirited and conceited one here, but when I look back at all the hours, all the hard work and intense labor put into my art over the years, it's almost insulting. Really. But oh well. We'll all have achieved what we had coming to us in the end. In my 3-D class, we're working on our plane project. What that basically means is that we're constructing modules out of bristol board and arranging them in a unifying composition. I wrote about this before. Well, all I have to say about the project thus far is that I'm going to have to enlist a regiment of friends who owe me, and then assign them tasks such as tracing, cutting, etc. This project is going to be so huge. I'm projecting I will need at least 50 modules to pull this Celtic knot I'm constructing off, and this is due in two weeks. *le sigh* Meanwhile, in the theater department, the place of perpetual drama-- no pun intended-- some professors have gotten together and want to take the tech students down to the Aronoff on May 7 to meet the technicians and designers and the cast behind "The Lion King." The problem? I have a fucking final exam in my 3-D class, and I assure you, I am pissed off. Mais c'est la vie. Work on the sets is proceeding as planned, however I would like to get a little bit ahead of schedule to plan for tragedies, which always seem to occur in theater one way or another (no pun intended there either). Next week I may finally hire a crew; it all depends if I finish "The Bandmaster" flooring or not. *** I've been thinking about my grandmother a lot, the one that died when I was in the sixth grade, and it suddenly occurred to me how much I really miss her. I probably wouldn't have been thinking too much about anything beyond my work if it hadn't been for the fact that I wrote a commemorative speech about her for class. While writing it, I suddenly began to remember things I had long suppressed because it had been too painful-- she and I were really close-- and all I can say now is, God, how I miss her. I concluded that if she had been here today, my parents wouldn't be in the schism that they're in now, and my dad would be a better man. She was the peacemaker, the rock, the matriarch of the Reno family. Some people just have this effect on others; I could almost swear that my parents would know peace if she was here-- here to help ease the pain on both sides. I've also come to realize that I've inherited a lot of her attributes. My face when I was a little girl looked strikingly like hers, and I find that I cough and clear my throat exactly like she used to-- the thing is, I didn't develop this until after her death. It's a little depressing to learn that I still haven't quite gotten over that rather traumatic period of my life, but I'm sure she hasn't quite left this earthly plain. I get strong feelings every now and then of her presence. I used to think it was just my intuition kicking in at full force, but then I've realized that there are some things I could not have known if there wasn't that whispering voice in the back of my head, that instant of just "knowing." (I don't believe that whispering voice to be a matter of pyschic powers, though) Then, of course, my cats always sense when something else is in the room. It makes me sad to think of her. The last Easter before she died, I remember sitting at her kitchen table thinking, They (both my grandparents on that side of the family) are not going to be here very much longer. And then I got up and began helping her boil the eggs she was going to let my brother and me dye. I insisted on helping with dinner; my mom didn't know what got into me, being so helpful all of a sudden when I had absolutely no interest in domestic skills, but I thought that anything I could do to ease Grandma's burden would make us both feel better. Oddly enough, that June my grandfather had a heartattack, and my grandmother had died from severe bronchial complications that August. I hate it when I'm right, especially when my intuition kicks in. So, yeah, I've been thinking about the years when I lived in Pittsburgh. I still want to take a genealogy trip there, but it doesn't look like that will be happening this summer. I could shoot for Christmas break later this year. Whatever happens, I miss my hometown so much. *** In some genealogy news, my second cousin Laurie recently contacted me because she was bit by the family tree bug. That makes three of us in the family! How exciting. She and I will be collaborating on my maternal grandmother's side, the Krasmanskys, who come from Poland and the Ukraine. I'm predicting it's going to be a tough branch to follow because the borders in that part of Europe were constantly changing. *** Christine, I hope you get on later this evening. I need to talk to you.
A Bit of History ~ And Onward! L'Amour Toujours! - August 08, 2005 |
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